10 Myths About Single Black Mothers

Myth 1: Single black moms have low-incomes: The ‘single black mom’ is most often portrayed as struggling and welfare-bound. She is not self-sufficient and because of this her children suffer.

Truth: Until you’ve seen or heard the reality of the situation with your own eyes and ears, reserve judgment. Many single, black mothers manage to maintain excellent jobs which allows them to support themselves, their children and anyone else she feels so inclined to bless.

Myth 2: A single Black mom raises delinquent children: Rarely does the media show a single black mother whose children can ‘do right.’ The child of a single Black mom is often portrayed as leading a doomed life filled with drugs, run-ins with the law, and illegitimate children.

Truth: Who among us doesn’t personally know someone who consistently overcomes obstacles, triumphs over any task and just so happened to be raised by a single mother. There are thousands. Never underestimate a black woman on a mission to raise a strong, successful child. Neither one of them can be stopped.

Myth 3: The single Black mom is just a ‘baby mama’: Most often, the assumption is that a single Black mom is and will always be a ‘baby mama’. She was not and will never be married and she is likely to continue to have children out of wedlock.

Truth: Many black women who have children out of wedlock do eventually marry the father of their children. When you have children with someone, you two will always share something and it’s difficult to walk away from that. Even if the mother and father of that particular child never get married, their situation may be beyond our understanding. The couple may not believe in a formalized, legal commitment, or more frequently the mother will find another man to marry.

Myth 4: Single Black moms are bad role models: Because they don’t have the “normal” family unit—mom, dad, and baby—many people assume that they are setting a poor example for their children and that their children are destined to do the same.

Truth: Single mothers can often serve as some of the best role models for their children. In any parenting situation, if the mother is honest, the child can learn from her mistakes, even if becoming a single mother wasn’t one of them. Portraits of single, black mothers often fail to include the possibility of death. Besides that, there are several single mothers who raise their children, obtain degrees, and serve as an inspiration for their children as well as others in their communities.

Myth 5: The father isn’t involved: When you’re a single Black mom—there is always the assumption that your child simply doesn’t have a father. As though, the child was just a product of some careless decision void of vows, love, or relationship.

Truth: There are countless examples of parents who aren’t together as a couple, but manage to stand as a united front when it comes to their children. If the parents are still together as a couple there are even more opportunities for him to bond with his children. Regardless of the situation there have always been black men who are invested in the rearing and nurturing of their little ones. This false assumption reflects poorly not just on black women but black men as well. Click here for more