Last week, single black women were ushered into the new year by an ABC News report that suggested "finding the right man is proving elusive." The segment, which aired on 'Nightline,' predictably framed the issue by asking "are the standards of black women too high or are the pickings too slim?" It's not exactly an original question.
The proposition has been repackaged time and time again. It's damaged goods at this point. Nonetheless, it's tempting to oversimplify the reasons why so many black women find themselves living the single life well into their thirties and beyond. It doesn't help that the chatter detailing their circumstances, although often misrepresented and misguided, stays at a fever pitch. It's hard to sort between fact and fiction at times.
In part, popular culture and the whole "life imitating art" concept are to blame. One too many television shows centered around gabbing girlfriends and three too many movies starring the ever-present Gabrielle Union and Morris Chestnut have provided watered down interpretations of male-female dynamics. Real-world relationships, and the pursuit of them, are multidimensional and far more nuanced. Therefore, the idea of reducing the real, heartfelt experiences of black women to the cliché storylines of the urban romantic comedy genre is a disservice to black women. It should also be noted at this point that some black women are actually single by choice, something that 'Nightline' chose not to acknowledge.
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